Meleng clenched his fists and braced himself as cold water poured over him. Cold water was best for washing away blood. He’d done this sort of thing many times before and knew this well, but this time was different. Usually in the past, when he’d had to clean up blood, it had been on other people. Even when he’d had to clean it off himself, there had been a lot less, or he’d been in warm places like Scovese or Ninifin where cold water was actually refreshing. Here, in the depths of the Hall of Knowledge in the middle of winter, the water wasn’t just cold; it was freezing. Not refreshing at all. He shivered and began scrubbing at the blood dried under his fingernails.
Sinitïa started to pat his back dry. However, the cloth she was using was already soaked from previous uses, so it didn’t do much good.
Meleng stared at himself in the nearby mirror as he scrubbed. The blood was mostly gone now, as was most of the accumulated dirt and grime from his recent travels.
Sinitïa put her arms around him from behind and rested her chin on his shoulder. Her hair was wet and tangled and her skin had a pinkish tinge to it—from scrubbing and the cold, not blood—but she looked good. Her warmth felt good against him in the cold room. She smiled at him through the mirror. “You look like you again.”
He smiled back. “So do you.”
They stared at one another through the mirror for a while—seconds, minutes, Meleng wasn’t sure exactly how long, though if it was measured in minutes, it probably wasn’t a lot of minutes.
“What did Mitchal Plavin mean when he talked about...what was it? He said something about my royal blood and seeds? Like plant seeds?”
“Sex.”
Sinitïa frowned. “I don’t get it.”
“He was referring to you getting pregnant. The seed thing is me putting a child in you like planting a tree. I think. Something like that.”
Sinitïa’s frown deepened into a scowl. “Gross. I didn’t like him.”
Meleng smiled at her. “I don’t blame you. I didn’t like him either.”
They grinned at each other.
“He didn’t hurt you too much, did he?” Meleng asked.
She turned her head away slightly, then shook it. “Not really. He still treated me like a princess even though I was a prisoner. He hurt Agernon more. He might have killed him if…” She sniffled and wiped her eyes.
Meleng held her tightly. He’d been afraid to talk to her about what had happened to her, Agernon, and Corvinian. This was the kind of thing he’d been terrified of when Sinitïa had first come with him and Jorvan. He kissed the side of her head. “It’s okay.”
She sniffled some more. “Corvinian’s light got in the way, and I screamed at him to stop. Not Corvinian. I mean…”
“I know what you mean.”
“He said he spared Agernon just to shut me up.”
“Then it’s good you made so much noise.”
She snorted. After a moment, she shifted around him to look him directly in the face instead of through the mirror. “If I ever had a baby, I’d want it to be with you. Not that I want a baby. I don’t. Just…”
“I know.”
There was a knock at the door.
Sinitïa looked about, and pointed to a large cloth towel. Meleng scrambled over and grabbed it. It was wet, but it would do. He threw it over Sinitïa’s shoulders and she hugged it around herself.
“Come in!” Sinitïa called.
The door opened and Feviona stepped in, then closed the door again behind her.
“Feviona!” Sinitïa jumped to her feet and ran over, the towel falling away as she did. They’d spent so many occasions changing in the same cramped quarters on the Lustrous Rose that all modesty between them had vanished ages ago. It was another way in which Sinitïa had changed since first coming with them in Arnor City.
Sinitïa and Feviona touched foreheads, and Sinitïa almost vanished as Feviona’s wings wrapped around her, hiding her from view.
Meleng stood up and walked over to them, and repeated the greeting ritual with Feviona.
When they parted, Sinitïa pointed to the wound in Feviona’s side. “Are you going to be okay?”
The Isyar had bandages wrapped around her side and stomach, and in several other locations as well. She was still wearing the same uniform as the night before, though she had obviously cleaned up somewhat. “I will be fine. I’ve stitched up what I can and made sure it won’t get infected.”
Sinitïa smiled. “That’s good.”
“I came to apologies to you both for my behaviour last night. When I get low on power and there is nothing to focus me, I act irrationally and sometimes inappropriately.”
“There’s nothing to apologise for,” Sinitïa said.
Meleng added a nod in agreement.
“I should not have kissed you.”
Sinitïa shrugged. “It’s okay. I actually kind of liked it.”
“It was still wrong.”
“Apology accepted,” Meleng said.
Sinitïa nodded. “Same with me.”
Feviona smiled. “Thank you. I also wanted to talk to you, Meleng, my champion.”
Meleng tightened and chuckled a little awkwardly. “Let’s not start that again.”
“I’m not trying to be funny. I use that term with affection, as I would be dead without you, but I can stop if you want.”
Meleng shrugged. “No, it’s okay. I just…” He wasn’t really sure what he wanted to say, so he changed the subject. “What did you want to talk to me about?”
“I have been watching you,” Feviona said. “I have been watching you very closely. You are brilliant, but your formulae leave something to be desired.”
Meleng groaned. He’d been watching her too. He knew how much better she was. Did she really have to bring it up?
Feviona shook her head. “No, please don’t be upset. As I said, you are brilliant, and I was about to add, your formulae are inventive within the constraints you have on them. You were just poorly trained. I have no doubt, in time, you would learn to overcome that. In time, you will become a great wizard.”
Sinitïa put an arm around him. “Of course you will. You’re the smartest person I’ve ever met.” With a smile, she let go of him and signed what she’d just said, just exchanging you with he.
“Thank you for the confidence, I suppose.” Meleng sighed. He probably shouldn’t have added the suppose, but it was hard to have the same confidence.
“But there’s a problem,” Feviona said. “We don’t have time. I have discussed it with Jorvanultumn, and we agree that, with everything happening, there isn’t time to wait for you to figure it out on your own. So I have decided to teach you myself.”
Meleng stared at her. Had he misread what she’d signed? He really wasn’t that good at it yet. He misread things all the time, though it was hard to think what she might have actually said if that were the case. Beside him, he could just notice Sinitïa bouncing on her toes.
Feviona stared back at him. “Well?”
Meleng gulped. “Oh. I...um…are you serious? I mean…” Damn, he’d forgotten to sign. “Are you allowed to do that? I thought Isyar couldn’t teach non-Isyar.”
Feviona shrugged. “You are my fomaze. The lines are blurred there.”
“Really?”
She shook her head. “No, not really. There are many who will not approve. In fact, I expect to have a very big argument with Mikranasta, but fuck her. This is my decision and yours. Not hers. I will teach you if you wish it.”
“Wow.” Meleng stared at her a little longer.
Sinitïa nudged him. “Say yes.”
“Yes.”
Sinitïa squealed and threw her arms around Feviona.
“Thank you,” Meleng said. “I don’t know what else to say.”
Feviona waited a moment until Sinitïa let go of her. “There is nothing you need to say. It will be my honour. I need a few days to recover my strength first, and I suspect we can all do with a rest. We will start in a week or so. And Jorvanultumn will teach you, Sinitïa.”
Sinitïa stopped bouncing around. “Really?”
“Yes, really.”
Sinitïa squealed even louder and hugged Feviona again. Then she hugged Meleng, laughing and giggling the whole time.
“Jorvanultumn will talk to you about details later, Sinitïa. He is currently talking to Mikranasta.” Feviona frowned. “Better him than me.” She smiled at the two of them. “I will let you finish cleaning up and talk to you later.”
Once Feviona was gone, Sinitïa spun round and hugged Meleng again. “Isn’t it exciting?”
“Yeah.” To be honest, it hadn’t quite sunk in. He knew he should feel excited, but it was also a reminder that he currently wasn’t that good at magic, even when he had convinced himself he was doing so much better. That assumed this was all real, of course.
No.
He wasn’t going down that route. This was real, and he was going to resist the urge to close and open his eyes to check.
Sinitïa had gone over to the dry part of the room where their fresh clothes were. She started to dress. “Chian—and I know we don’t really want to think about her—but she told me I could be the most powerful human wizard who ever lived. Do you think that’s true?”
He smiled at her. “Yes, I think you really could be.”
She grinned back. “Honestly, I don’t really care about being the most powerful. I just want to be strong enough to kill people like Mitchal Plavin.”
Meleng’s heart skipped a beat. He must have grimaced or frowned or something, as Sinitïa’s expression drooped.
“What?”
He shook his head. “Nothing. I’m sure you’ll be very powerful.”
She paused in her dressing and tilted her head. “No, tell me.”
“Tell you what?”
“You looked...I don’t know, disappointed or sad at what I said.”
“No, no. I was… I’m happy for you.”
“Don’t lie to me, Meleng.”
‘I’m not. Honest. I’m very happy.”
She nodded slowly. “I’m sure you are, but something happened. You looked almost frightened. I saw it. I’m not stupid. You taught me that.”
He gulped. “No, of course you’re not stupid. I would never imply…” He looked away from her. He should admit his fears, but that would mean admitting to himself how she’d changed.
“What? Please tell me, Melly.”
“It’s just…” He took a deep breath and looked at her. “I’m just a little sad to see your innocence vanishing. When you said you wanted to kill people… I knew something like this would happen. I’ve been afraid of it since you joined me to go to Isyaria. We see such horrible things, have such horrible things done to us. Sometimes, we do horrible things ourselves. I’ve watched so many people die in the last year. Watched so many people get hurt. I’ve gotten hurt a few times myself. It changes you. You don’t know the nightmares I have. I wanted to spare you that. If you’d stayed at the Palace, you would have been safe from that. You could have stayed innocent. I’m so sorry I’ve inflicted all this on you.”
She stared at him silently for several moments, her eyes glistening with the hint of tears and her lips quivering. “I wasn’t lying when I said you’re the smartest person I’ve ever met, but sometimes you can say some incredibly stupid things. You’re so down on yourself all the time. You think I don’t know the nightmares you go through? Sure, I don’t experience them, but I watch you toss, turn, and shake every night. I hold you and comfort you when you wake up screaming. But you don’t remember that, do you?”
“I…” He vaguely recalled moments like that, but he’d thought they were just dreams, too. He was still so unsure of what was real these days.
“And do you think I don’t notice you still double-check to see if I’m real?”
“I’m sorry.”
“No! Don’t be sorry for that. That’s not your fault, and I’m not angry at that. I’m here for you whenever you need it. I will always comfort you at night, and I will do whatever you need me to do to prove I’m real. I’m angry that you think I should go back to being what I was before. That I shouldn’t have changed. I changed because you showed me I could be so much more. You think I’d be safer at the Palace? Maybe safe from being stabbed or something, but I’d also be without the people I love and the people who love me. People like Feviona and Jorvan. And you. Sure, my mom loves me in her own way, and I love her. But it’s not the same. She thinks I’m stupid. Annai thinks I’m stupid. I thought I was stupid. And they treated me like shit. Excuse my language, but they did. They treated me like shit. You want me to go back to that?”
Meleng shook his head. “No, of course not. I’m sorry. I just…” He lowered his head and held back the tears. “I was so scared for you yesterday. So scared you were going to die. If that had happened, I would have never forgiven myself for getting you into this. I love you so much and I don’t want you to die.” He fell to his knees and slumped over, tears flowing freely. “I’m so sorry.”
She rushed over to him, sat beside him, and hugged him tight. “It’s okay. I don’t want to die either, and I don’t want you to die. If you do, I don’t know what I’d do. Probably cry a lot. A lot a lot. But I like who I’ve become, and I hope you do too, because I don’t want to go back to who I was.”
Meleng blinked several times to clear his eyes of the tears, and looked her in the face. “I do like who you’ve become. Believe me.”
She leaned forward and kissed his nose. “I do believe you. Because I can always tell. You’re not a very good liar. Please don’t ever lie to me again.”
“I promise.” He kissed her.
There was another knock at the door and Corvinian’s voice came from the other side. “You two decent?”
Sinitïa put a hand over her mouth to stifle her giggle. “What do we say?” she whispered. “If we say no, he’ll think we’re having sex, and if we say yes, he’ll come in and well…” She motioned to the fact they were both mostly naked.
“What do you want?” Meleng called back.
“We’ve had word from the palace. Felitïa is all right. She wants us to come see her.”
“We’ll be along soon.”
“Okay, I’ll let you finish having sex first.” Corvinian’s laughter faded out as he presumably walked away.
Sinitïa shook her head and sighed. “They’ll never stop, will they?”
Meleng shook his head. “He’s just teasing. But probably not.”
Sinitïa’s eyes widened. “But Felitïa! We have to go see her!” She jumped to her feet and hurried back over to her clothes.
Meleng followed her to his own clothes.
“Do you think Felitïa will be excited to see us? What do you think she’s had to go through? Do you think she’s been hurt at all?”
Meleng smiled at Sinitïa as she continued to ask various questions. He closed his eyes briefly, and opened them again. Nothing had changed. She was real. Then he did his best to answer Sinitïa’s questions whenever she left enough of a gap for him to do so.
* * * * *
The guards opened the throne room doors. Akna glanced at Anita, who took a deep breath and then nodded. The two of them proceeded into the room, the guards falling into step behind them.
Anita was wearing a deep purple gown in a typical Arnorin style—though given how cold it got here, Akna was beginning to understand why Arnorins wore so much fabric. The gown had very wide skirts, requiring Akna to stand a couple feet to Anita’s side rather than right by her. The purple colour was for mourning her father and—soon—her brother.
Akna was still in the same clothes they had given her at the Hall of Knowledge. She could have changed into her New Year’s gown, but she hadn’t wanted to get that dirty, and what she was about to do would definitely ruin it. Anita had promised to have a replacement for her Youth Guard uniform made, but that was going to take time. So for now, she would just make do.
Slumped in the throne at the far end of the room was Danel. He looked up as they approached and ran a hand through his dishevelled hair. “What is the meaning of this? Why are they still free? Guards! Arrest that thing!” He pointed at Akna.
The guards remained behind Akna and Anita, moving as the two of them moved.
“Guards! I said arrest that savage! Obey me!” His voice was loud, but it shook and cracked as he spoke. He knew what was coming.
When they reached the steps to the throne, Anita held out a hand, motioning Akna to stop. She then proceeded a few steps closer. She stopped still outside of Danel’s reach, but if he lunged forward… Akna tensed herself, ready to leap in if needed.
“Anita, what is the meaning of this?”
Anita shook her head sadly. “It’s over, Danel. You know that, right?”
“Guards!”
“The guards aren’t listening to you anymore. You sent their compatriots into a pointless and losing battle. They have no reason to listen to you when they know your successor will treat them better.”
Danel sneered and straightened up, tried to make himself look confident and menacing, but the fear on his face gave him away. “What successor? I am still lord here.”
“Only on the technicality that you are not dead yet.”
“You…” His voice cracked again. “You can’t kill me. If you do, you give up your claim to the lordship.”
Anita gave him a sad smile, a hint of tears in her eyes. “Another technicality. The official report will say you were killed by Akna who was being mind-controlled by Plavistalorik. There is no one in this palace who will contradict that.”
Danel lost his composure, shaking his head madly. “You can’t do this. I’m your brother!”
“Yes, you are, and it is something for which I feel endless shame.” Anita’s voice was cracking now, and she turned away from him. Tears started to stream down as she approached Akna.
“You’re sure you’re okay with this?” Akna said quietly.
Anita nodded. “I ask only two things.”
Akna was pretty sure she knew what they were, but she let Anita say them anyway.
“One, wait until I’m out of the room. I don’t want to witness it. Two, make it quick. He has done terrible things, but he is still my brother, and I foolishly still have love for him. I don’t want him to suffer.”
“You have my word.” Akna wanted to lean over and hug her, offer her comfort, but the width of Anita’s skirts made that too awkward, so she settled with a comforting smile.
Anita looked back at Danel. “Farewell, Danel.” Then she started striding back across the room towards the door. One of the guards went with her.
“No! Anita!” Danel threw himself from the throne and down the steps. Akna moved in front of him and he fell to his knees. “Anita! Please! Anita!”
Anita paused, and looked back. “The appropriate form of address is, your Ladyship.” Then she continued on her way, not looking back again.
Danel continued to call out to her until she was out the doors. Then he fell to the floor, burying his face in the carpet, sobbing.
Akna watched him for a moment. So pathetic, but exactly as he had shown himself so often to be: full of confidence and spite when he believed he had others to enforce his desires, but a snivelling coward when those others weren’t there. Part of her wanted to watch him whimper and sob longer, but she had promised Anita to make it quick. “Get up.”
He looked up at her, his tear-streaked face pulled back in a rictus of fear.
“I said, get up.”
He rose only to his knees. “Please. I’ll give you anything. My family’s riches are still mine. I’ll give you anything you want. Anything your heart desires. Riches beyond anything you’ve ever seen. I...I can even give you Anita as...as your plaything, or whatever you want her for.”
Akna scowled. For a brief moment, she had almost felt a bit of pity for him, but after that statement, there was nothing he could say to ever make her feel anything other than utter contempt and disgust for him.
She grabbed him by the chin, forced him to his feet, and forced him to look her in the eyes. “You want to know what I want from you, asshole?”
He shivered and whimpered. He might have been trying to nod or shake his head, but her grip on his chin was making whatever he wanted impossible. There was a stench rising from him. He had clearly soiled himself.
“I want you dead. That’s all.”
He whimpered again.
Akna spun him around so his back was against her, and secured him in a headlock with one arm. With her other hand, she raised her dagger and slit his throat. She then let his briefly twitching body fall onto the steps by the throne, blood pooling around it. Within a moment, he was still.
Akna wiped her dagger, and turned to the remaining guard. “Dispose of the body and get this place cleaned up before her Ladyship returns.”
The guard snapped to attention and saluted.
With a satisfied smile, Akna turned and walked out of the room.
