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Table of Contents

Chapter 1: Locusts at the Gate Chapter 2: A New Name Chapter 3: The Capital Prepares Chapter 4: The Princess is Dead, Long Live the Princess Chapter 5: Outside the Gates Chapter 6: Inside the Black Tent Chapter 7: Surrender at the Temple Chapter 8: The Cult of the Locust Chapter 9: The Locust's Tenets of Faith Chapter 10: Mourners on the Cliff Chapter 11: The Eye of Betrayal Chapter 12: The Dead King's Bedchamber Chapter 13: The Arms of the Goddess Chapter 14: Zayaan of the Narim Chapter 15: The Eyes of the Priestess Chapter 16: A More Permanent Disguise Chapter 17: Tribute Chapter 18: Sacrifice of the New Moon Chapter 19: The Lost Bird Chapter 20: Manah and the Priestess Chapter 21: Desert Creatures Chapter 22: Become the Swarm Chapter 23 The Price of Betrayal Chapter 24: Life Under the Locust Chapter 25: Wild Rose Chapter 26: The Lady Wren Chapter 27: Thought and Desire Chapter 28: The Lady's Captivity Chapter 29: The Wine Maiden Chapter 30: End of Childhood Chapter 31: The Children of Aisha Chapter 32: The Forest Runner Chapter 33: Three Sisters Chapter 34: The Hunt Chapter 35: Bones in the Forest Chapter 36: Lullaby Chapter 37: The Hunter's Horn Chapter 38: Ways Between Ways Chapter 39: Morning Star Chapter 40: A Prophecy for Baraz Chapter 41: Equinox Fires Chapter 42: The Lord Prince Takri Chapter 43: Evening Star Sets Chapter 44: Chaos in the Courtyard Chapter 45: Dasha Chapter 46: Memories Chapter 47: The Body Slave Chapter 48: Caged Beasts Chapter 49: Message from the Capital Chapter 50: Heresiarch Chapter 51: The Color of Blood Chapter 52: Winter Winds Chapter 53: The Bookmaker's Closet Chapter 54: Wrapped in Dignity and Beauty Chapter 55: Vessel of the Goddess Chapter 56: Cracks in the Walls Chapter 57: Two Brothers Chapter 58: The Court of Women Chapter 59: Favored of the King Chapter 60: The Sweetest Fruit Chapter 61: Daughter of the Temple Chapter 62: A Nation of Bastards Chapter 63: The Lute Player Chapter 64: Aisha's Prayer Chapter 65: Promises Chapter 66: Lives Lost Chapter 67: The Tea Maker Chapter 68: Object of Desire Chapter 69: Empty Shelves Chapter 70: Darkness and Light Chapter 71: The Love of Men Chapter 72: The Cursed Ones Chapter 73: Hiding Places Chapter 74: Old Men's Tales Chapter 75: False Prophecies Chapter 76: The Lord Prince Radu Chapter 77: Love Becomes Life Chapter 78: Mistress and Mother Chapter 79: A Test of Strength Chapter 80: The Strigoi-Viu Cometh Chapter 81: Scraps from the Table Chapter 82: A Fool's Errand Chapter 83: The Little Ghost Chapter 84: Stolen Honeycakes Chapter 85: Breathe Chapter 86: Beneath the Palace Chapter 87: Red Pebbles Chapter 88: Common Men Chapter 89: Love and Duty Chapter 90: Nightmares Chapter 91: Earth and Sun Chapter 92: Love and Creation Chapter 93: Until My Last Breath Chapter 94: Fruit and Flower Chapter 95: Two Days Chapter 96: Small Comforts Chapter 97: Heroes Chapter 98: Fire, Water, and Wax Chapter 99: Beneath the Temple Chapter 100: the Way of Eagles

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Chapter 77: Love Becomes Life

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Three days after her conversation with the Holy Mother, Nasreen awoke in the women’s dormitory feeling more like herself than she felt in months. The last traces of her fever were gone. Her joints no longer ached. A sense of well-being washed over her as she stretched the sleep from her muscles.  She rolled over on her pallet to face Aisha, who was pulling on her woolen robes as fast as she could. 

"Are you excited to return to the library, Aisha?" asked Nasreen, sitting up in bed still wrapped in her blankets.  "I have never seen you throw your clothes on so quickly!" 

"The Holy Mother wishes to speak with me after inspection," answered Aisha.  "I need to make sure to eat before she gets her hold on me, or I won't have another chance until nightfall.  I don't know what she wants, but whenever she wants to speak with me, it always means something bad." 

"It will be alright, little sister," said Nasreen, dropping her voice to a whisper.  "It is only for a little longer until we find a safe way out." 

Aisha placed her undergarments at the foot of her pallet and then sat down next to Nasreen, leaning her head on the older girl's shoulder.  "We are going to need food to take with us.  From what I have heard the others say, there is none to be found anywhere in the country because of the famine. We are lucky to have anything here in the temple. Maybe we should wait until spring to leave. At least here we won’t starve as quickly." 

"Do not worry. We can take what we need from the brothel's stores.  Leave it to me," said Nasreen.  "Now, go get your breakfast while there is still some left in the pot!" 

"Don't forget you need to eat, too!" said Aisha.  "You are still recovering." 

"I will.  Now, go get your food before she comes searching for you.” 

Aisha headed to the central fire to get her bowl of thin gruel, keeping her eyes out for the Holy Mother as she did. 

Nasreen pulled her hands out from under the blankets and inspected them. No matter how well she bandaged them before she laid down for the night, they always seemed to unravel as she slept.  She unwound the strips of cloth from her right hand until she reached the layer next to her skin, stiff with fluid and blood from broken blisters underneath. She worked carefully to loosen the bandages to no avail. Underneath them her skin was raw and bloody. The cold air of the dormitory set her fingers to burning as soon as they were exposed.   

She reached for the procuress's salve at the side of her pallet, leaving a smudge of blood on her bedding as she did. Nasreen stared for a moment at the red stain and the bottle of ointment.   

In the womb, love becomes life.  If love is growing inside me, how can I destroy it?   

She drew her bloodied hand back under the blankets, looking about the room to see if anyone was watching.  

They will not take motherhood from me as they have taken everything else. I am a child of the Lady. My child will be the same. 

A moment later she withdrew her hand from between her legs. She applied the salve to her wounds, followed by fresh bandages. By the time she began work on her other hand, the Holy Mother and the young woman serving as her eyes were beginning the morning inspection at the opposite end of the room.   

Nasreen kept her eyes on them as she laid her now bloody undergarments at the foot of the bed for inspection.  She pulled on fresh clothes and then went to join Aisha for breakfast as if nothing happened. The smell of the gruel wafted towards her causing her stomach of growl audibly.  For the first time in days, she felt peaceful enough to eat.  

Soon Aisha and I will be safe far across the mountain or we will be dead and beyond the grasp of the strigoi-viu, in the arms of the Goddess. Either is better than this endless dread. 

She took her bowl from the young serving woman and looked around for her younger friend.  Aisha waved to her from a spot close to the fire. 

"I got a warm spot today since I got here so early," said Aisha as Nasreen joined her. 

"I must be hungry," said Nasreen as she took her first mouthful of food.  "Boiled grains have never tasted so good." 

"You've barely eaten for the last three days!" said Aisha.  "Of course it tastes good." 

"At the palace, the King had so much food for dinner you couldn't see the table underneath it!" said Nasreen.  "But I was too scared to eat more than a few bites." 

"Was there venison?" asked Aisha.  "And bread?  And cheese?" 

Nasreen nodded. 

"I miss cheese," said Aisha. 

"So do I," said Nasreen.  "Who would think we would be dreaming of cheese and bread when we live in the temple where no one goes hungry?" 

"It isn't the Lady's temple anymore," said Aisha.  "It belongs to the Locusts now." 

"Stop," said Nasreen.  "It is the Lady's temple as long as we believe it to be so." 

Aisha smiled and nodded.  "Nasreen, I am so glad you are better, and that you didn't stay at the palace.  I don't know what I would do without you." 

Nasreen went to ruffle Aisha's hair, but Aisha pulled away before she could.  "The Holy Mother is getting close to our beds.  I am going back over there.  I hope she doesn't want much from me today." 

"Me, too," said Nasreen.  She drank the last of the liquid from her bowl and followed her friend back to their side of the room.  The Holy Mother and her eyes had already begun their inspection. 

"Nasreen," said the Holy Mother.  "Has she bled?" 

"Yes, Holy Mother," said the young woman serving as her eyes.  "There is blood on the undergarments." 

"Good," said the Holy Mother.  "One less thing to be worried about.  I was beginning to think we would need the herbs.  I don't want to administer them to any of us unless we have to.  It is not safe when the blood is weak from lack of food." 

"Thank you, Holy Mother," said Nasreen.  "For your care of all of us." 

"You are recovering well from your adventures, I trust?" asked the Holy Mother.  "I smell the ointment they use in the kitchen for burns.  I assume the procuress brought you the salve for your hands?" 

"Yes, Holy Mother," said Nasreen.  "She is taking good care of me." 

"As she should."  The old woman turned her attention to Aisha.  "I can tell by the smell of vinegar and piss that the bookmaker is here." 

"Yes, Holy Mother," said Aisha.  "I am at your service." 

"Eyes, finish our inspection and report back to me when I return," said the old woman.  "I have business in the library to which I must attend.  Aisha will serve as my eyes until then." 

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