Repentance
Table of Contents
Prologue Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6 Chapter 7 Chapter 8 Chapter 9 Chapter 10 Chapter 11 Chapter 12 Chapter 13 Chapter 14 Chapter 15 Chapter 16 Chapter 17 Chapter 18 Chapter 19 Chapter 20 Chapter 21 Chapter 22 Chapter 23 Chapter 24 Chapter 25 Chapter 26 Chapter 27 Chapter 28 Chapter 29 Chapter 30 Chapter 31 Chapter 32 Chapter 33 Chapter 34 Chapter 35 Chapter 36 Chapter 37 Chapter 38 Chapter 39 Chapter 40 Chapter 41 Chapter 42 Chapter 43 Chapter 44 Chapter 45 Chapter 46 Chapter 47 Chapter 48 Chapter 49 Chapter 50 Chapter 51 Chapter 52 Chapter 53 Chapter 54 Chapter 55 Chapter 56 Chapter 57 Chapter 58 Chapter 59 Chapter 60 Chapter 61 Chapter 62 Chapter 63 Chapter 64 Chapter 65 Chapter 66 Chapter 67 Chapter 68 Chapter 69 Chapter 70 Chapter 71 Chapter 72 Chapter 73 Chapter 74 Chapter 75 Chapter 76 Chapter 77 Chapter 78 Chapter 79 Chapter 80 Chapter 81 Chapter 82 Chapter 83 Chapter 84 Chapter 85 Chapter 86 Chapter 87 Chapter 88 Chapter 89 Chapter 90 Chapter 91 Chapter 92 Chapter 93 Chapter 94 Chapter 95 Chapter 96 Chapter 97 Chapter 98 Chapter 99 Chapter 100 Chapter 101 Chapter 102 Chapter 103 Chapter 104 Chapter 105 Chapter 106 Chapter 107 Chapter 108 Chapter 109 Chapter 110 Chapter 111 Chapter 112 END ???Chapter 82
"Vanity of vanities," says the preacher. "All is vanity!"
Seth sat alone on a small boulder, alone with his thoughts, after dismissing everyone to their homes. Even his trusted friends have returned to the community, leaving him in this open plain where the grass and windy atmosphere provided serenity.
Looking up, he contemplated everything that had occurred, from meeting Bruno to being baptized by John the Baptist himself. Despite this, he doesn't understand why he's even doing this in the first place, despite his willingness and love for all.
Mountains and hills stretch out in the background, their peaks rising sharply and their valleys dipping low, casting deep shadows in the morning sun. The plains are vast and rolling, carpeted with short, stubby grass that ripples like waves in the wind.
The scent of wildflowers and fresh air permeates the air, wafting in with the gentle breeze. The sun is high overhead, beating down with a pleasant warmth that warms his skin and leaves a layer of sweat on his brow. Along with having a pleasant atmosphere that is rather a strong gust of wind from time to time, its cooling effect is actually enough for anyone to relax at once.
So many people have traveled across this land, seeking wisdom and enlightenment in the wake of their passing. From small villages to bustling towns, they have all seen many different views. But none can compare to the uncertainty of life itself.
What does man gain from all his labor in which he labors under the sun? One generation goes, and another generation comes, but the earth remains forever. The sun also rises, and the sun goes down and hurries to its place where it rises. The wind goes toward the south and turns around to the north. It turns around continually as it goes, and the wind returns again to its course.
All the rivers run into the sea, yet the sea is not full. To the place where the rivers flow, they flow again. All things are full of weariness beyond uttering. The eye is not satisfied with seeing, nor is the ear filled with hearing. That which has been is that which shall be, and that which has been done is that which shall be done, and there is no new thing under the sun.
Is there a thing of which it may be said, “Behold, this is new?” It has been long ago, in the ages that were before us. There is no memory of the former, nor shall there be any memory of the latter that is to come among those that shall come after.
He can't imagine himself saving this world; there might be more worlds that need saving. Infinite lives and possibilities await him in the future, which is likely to never end. Is this the price of being the Son of God? And what is the point of saving one world when there is infinity of them?
And even if he sacrifice himself, human beings will continue to fight and kill each other. Wars will be fought. Lives will be destroyed. The cycle of violence will continue. Nothing will change. And it's always about greed. Why would he want to save a world where sin is present? What is the point of saving a world that still continues to sin?
Seth is exhausted and unable to understand this reason. Is existence, full of pain and misery, supposed to be this way? Or is it all the result of human actions and choices? If that's the case, how can he claim that his faith and belief are justified when everything he has gone through seems to suggest otherwise?
Does nothing change? Is it all for naught? There are so many realities and events that have, can, already, or have not happened. It's all meaningless in the end, isn't it? Just a continuous loop of one thing after another, with no resolution and no conclusion. How is anyone supposed to be content with this kind of existence?
So how does one deal with their problems when there is no solution that doesn't require more pain and suffering than is necessary to solve them? Should people keep quiet and pretend everything is fine while they waste away their lives in hopelessness and despair?
The holy man frowned at his thoughts, feeling distraught about the purpose given to him. He just doesn't understand why all of these events are occurring around him or what the meaning behind them all is. It's like he's stuck in a limbo of sorts, not knowing when or how to break free of it.
Then he heard the approaching footsteps of the boy, lowering his head to see the boy with an uneaseful look. "Solomon?" Seth questioned, concern laced in tone at the unexpected return of the child, as he didn't expect anyone to join him during his moment of peace.
Solomon stopped in front of him, his face full of discomfort, before saying, "Can I sit with you?" He asked with a hesitant look across his features, clearly troubled by something that has been bothering him greatly to the point of coming here alone.
Casting a sympathetic gaze toward him, "You may," the holy man answered softly as he shifted slightly to allow enough space for the child to settle in, gesturing the boy to come over in a comforting manner that made the child perk up and immediately strode toward the rock before taking a seat beside him.
Feeling the cold stone beneath him and the wind still blowing through their clothes, Solomon can sense a certain sense of serenity and calm within himself. The world around him is silent, as if there is no noise whatsoever—an eternal stillness that is both disarming and calming.
Turning to the boy, he spoke in a gentle tone, "How are you?" Gazing at the child with a smile, he says, "You are out early and all by yourself." Seth continued curiously as he hoped to start a conversation with him, wondering why Solomon would go out of his way to meet him.
A brief silence passed before Solomon answered. "I made a lot of mistakes," he answered, confessing something personal to him. He averted his eyes, ashamed of himself, while tightening his fists with shame at having to admit to them, "Do you think I deserve a second chance?" An answer that the Son of God already knew what it meant to ask.
"There's no need to worry," Seth assured with a forgiving expression on his features, patting the boy's head with a fatherly-like manner. "Believe in me and my forgiveness; I will take care of it," he reassured the child, who let out a shaky breath in response. "All who are wicked, evil, degenerate, vile, and cruel shall be granted mercy as long as their hearts desire it, just as long as they repent themselves to the Lord above," the holy man explained with absolute certainty in his beliefs.
Relieved, the boy released an audible exhale as the tension he previously felt subsided, relaxing muscles with gratitude for being forgiven by someone so righteous. "Thank you," Solomon murmured sincerely before his mind went into further thought, thinking of all the deserving people he killed or tortured unjustly just to satisfy his own vengeful desires.
"After seeing heaven and that dove..." Solomon trailed off uncertainly, glancing upward briefly at the cloudy sky. "I wanted to become Christian." His answer completely caught Seth off guard, leaving the holy man speechless at this decision as it came abruptly.
Despite the sudden answer, Seth was full of joy in hearing this: "I am glad to hear this, and having such passionate conviction in wanting to be a disciple of the Lord, I am honored for your decision and hope to see you succeed in this path," praising the boy with all his heart.
However, Solomon shifted uncomfortably: "So does that mean all my sins are forgiven?" He asked, wanting to get clarification on how it worked for him specifically. The boy wanted to know what would happen to him if he converted to Christianity. "Is that how it works?"
And the Son of Man smiled, lifting his right hand and pointing upwards. "Do you want God to forgive your sins?" As Solomon nodded in affirmation to his question, "For if you forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you don’t forgive men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses," shocking the boy wholeheartedly from his words.
Confusion written across the face: "huh?" The child muttered, flabbergasted at the answer, blinking owlishly at him, "You mean, I have to...!" Horror overtook him at the idea of having to forgive others in order to receive forgiveness himself. "Why do I have to do that?! They're bad people! I can't ever possibly forgive them!" The young boy exclaimed furiously, with clenched fists, at being ordered to do something so impossible.
Seth simply stared at him, his face full of sorrow and understanding: "It is difficult, I tell you, but not impossible. You must learn to forgive others if you are truly committed to having the heavenly father forgive all the sinful deeds that have been committed upon you, as that is the way it should be," the holy man spoke with strong determination.
Clenching his fists tightly, Solomon looked down at his own feet in anger and disbelief at the very notion of forgiving the very wicked men who committed horrendous acts towards innocent people. How is that fair? How is that right? Is justice supposed to be that way?
Gritting his teeth, the young boy desperately tried to quell the growing rage that boiled within him before it immediately stopped when a gentle hand firmly grabbed his shoulder. "This is why you must forgive others," the holy man stated quietly with a sad smile on his face.
Tilting head up to face him, "but they're the ones who started it first! They're the ones who deserve punishment!" Solomon pointed this out angrily in defending his reasons. He had every right to do what he did. They were in the wrong, and they should be held accountable for it. "They deserve it," he spat bitterly.
Grief, sadness, and despair swirled in Seth's heart. "Deserving or not, grace spreads goodness and compassionate kindness that cannot be repaid regardless of who they are, especially when you're doing the same in trying to be a better person," he explained solemnly while shaking his head disapprovingly. "When you hate and hurt someone, it becomes a disease that spreads from person to person and anyone who associates with that said person. You must remove hatred from your heart and show that you are a better person by forgiving the ones who have wronged you," he added softly.
Scoffing, "The last thing I would want to do is show that kind of weakness to the people who hurt me!" Solomon responded harshly, "So what? Should I let them continue being lowlifes? Is that it?!" He shouted defiantly at him as the holy man listened patiently.
"You have the right to defend yourself just like any animal or man should, but have you not thought of talking to them if given the chance? Redeeming those lost souls and showing a better path than the one they chose?" Seth inquired while giving a knowing look: "Every man has a different level of tolerance and capability, so it would be fair to give others a chance to understand them for what they are and help guide them in a better direction than the one they have chosen," he informed in trying to make the child comprehend.
Then the holy man raised a finger and pointed it at Solomon's supposed heart. "If you have a wound in your heart and refuse to heal it, then your heart will never recover, and it will always remain raw, vulnerable, and exposed until finally, the wound will fester and infect everything else around it," catching the boy's attention fully. "Do not become like them for the sake of fighting evil but instead do good in God's name. Spread kindness, mercy, and love so they will turn away from their wicked ways and repent," he said, letting out a long sigh after finishing his sentence.
Solomon stood up and took a couple of steps forward before finally dropping down onto his knees and saying, "I..." How can he do this? Is it even possible to say the words out loud? His heart has already become consumed with hate, and now he's expected to let it all go in a blink of an eye.
Suddenly, Seth spoke with calmness radiating from his body: "It is okay to feel angry, frustrated, or even sad; it's what makes us human, and that's why we're born with the capacity to experience all these things in our lives, but don't let them control you or else that pain will eat away at you." His soothing voice cut through the silence like a knife, and the boy felt all of his previous worries melting away instantly.
Looking back, he saw the anticipated Seth, who was patient and kind despite all his shortcomings: "You are a good person and always will be no matter who tells you otherwise," encouraging him further with a bright smile on his face: "We make mistakes in order to learn from them and become better people, so don't feel discouraged by the fact that you have flaws or make mistakes. You just have to learn from them," the man explained softly at this point.
Turning his head towards his whole body, trying to even say the words "f-f-f-o-r-g-i-v" was difficult for him as the mere utterance of them caused extreme emotional pain and inner turmoil to erupt throughout his entire body.
Sighing, Seth stood up and walked around him before kneeling in front of the boy, extending his open palms outward, still maintaining a comforting demeanor. "Hold onto my hands and listen to what I will say to you," he commanded gently.
Raising his trembling hands, he reached out and gripped tightly onto the holy man's fingers with desperation as he couldn't stand to look anywhere but at their interlocked limbs. "Listen to my voice and close your eyes," Seth instructed firmly, his tone authoritative but not harsh.
As Solomon complied, he awaited for whatever instruction he would receive next: "Take a deep breath and breathe in slowly," doing as instructed before holding it for several seconds before releasing it slowly. "Good, do it again and imagine my words," the holy man said.
"He who dwells in the secret place of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty."
The boy imagined himself in a vast green landscape full of beautiful flowers and tall trees, with branches swaying in a gentle breeze, where the orange sky hung above, surrounded by the sounds of chirping birds while butterflies flutter around happily.
"I will say of Yahweh, “He is my refuge and my fortress; my God, in whom I trust."
Solomon looked around, hearing the voice echoing throughout the vast land like waves crashing against rocks that scattered around it while the warm rays of sunlight shone down upon the ground, bathing the earth below in its glow.
"For he will deliver you from the snare of the fowler and from the deadly pestilence. He will cover you with his feathers. Under his wings, you will take refuge. His faithfulness is your shield and rampart. You shall not be afraid of the terror by night, nor of the arrow that flies by day."
The words were clear and sharp, cutting through the air like a knife through butter; each syllable seemed to ring in the boy's ears as if they were bells being struck repeatedly with precision.
"Nor of the pestilence that walks in darkness, nor of the destruction that wastes at noon. A thousand may fall at your side, and ten thousand at your right hand; but it will not come near you."
He looked up to see many wicked men falling in the distance from his left and right shoulders, their screams and cries echoing throughout the land as they continued their descent in a never-ending loop that forever plagued his consciousness.
"You will only look with your eyes and see the recompense of the wicked."
Each man who has fallen did not believe the Lord have also carry a terrible sin in their dark hearts; they become heavy, filled with pain and sin that weighs them down more than anything else imaginable. Lust, envy, greed, sloth, wrath, gluttony, and pride are among the seven sins that have carried their burdens into the afterlife, condemning them to an eternity of hellfire.
"Because you have made Yahweh your refuge and the Most High your dwelling place, no evil shall happen to you, nor shall any plague come near your dwelling."
Presence suddenly manifested at both of his sides, surprising him as two humanoid angels appeared in vision with wings pure white in color and an appearance full of illumination.
"For he will put his angels in charge of you, to guard you in all your ways. They will bear you up in their hands, so that you won’t dash your foot against a stone."
Suddenly, they gently grabbed his hands before being lifted effortlessly up into the air and carried over the lush fields below. The sun rose high above as its rays shone down upon them, embracing them in its warmth and light altogether.
"You will tread on the lion and cobra. You will trample the young lion and the serpent underfoot."
In the distance, there were mighty lion and cobra staring up at him with anticipation; their bodies displayed a sign of strength and power, they were covered with thick layers of muscle that rippled across their skin. But their power was all for naught.
When the angels lowered themselves down to them, Solomon stepped on the lion's back, causing it to roar in submission to the mighty one guiding this boy, knowing full well that the true king on top is on the boy's side. The child then proceeded to walk across its back before reaching the other side of the creature while the angels still held his hands.
As he stepped onto the cobra, it fall down in defeat, for the Son of God is protecting this child, walking over its head before the creature finally slithered away pitifully.
"Because he has set his love on me, therefore I will deliver him. I will set him on high because he knows my name. He will call on me, and I will answer him. I will be with him in trouble. I will deliver him and honor him."
Solomon felt the angels disappear, leaving him alone in this place. He then instinctively looked ahead to see the King of kings manifesting from a blinding light. "He will call on me, and I will answer him. I will be with him in trouble. I will deliver him and honor him," the holy man smiled with happiness.
Tears stream down his face, taking careful steps before dropping down his knees once again as he desperately bring his hands to the messiah. "I forgive them," were his final words before collapsing into a sobbing heap, causing Seth to embrace him, holding onto the young boy protectively.
"I will satisfy him with a long life and show him my salvation."
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